Drew

Last night I went to my local pub for drinks as Drew, a good friend of mine is leaving for pastures new, Pinner in Middlesex to be precise, it's within the M25 but more on the fringe of London.

I can't recall when I met Drew exactly on coming to Newark, he was just there and was very much a presence and personality. He's a charismatic individual with a great enthusiasm for life, we've always had fantastic banter and I guess I've always been the Moriarty to his Sherlock Holmes!

Drew is a fantastically articulate lad and has so many hobbies and interests at times I've lost count or just not listened to the less interesting ones! That said, I wish I was as gifted as he is at a lot of things and his versatility and skills are to be commended, oh and he did build me a cracking PC!

Instant likeability is something many strive for or crave but Drew has it in spades, he's a good all rounder, has a great way with words (though he can't match my wit) and he's definitely a great character that will be greatly missed here. It was good to see the local pub packed with so many friends and family there to say goodbye, though I'm pretty sure we'll see plenty of him in the future. I wish him well and I've no doubt that with his capabilities he'll get on with future adventures with his usual aplomb. It's great that he's doing this, life is all about going off and doing things and and having new experiences.

Drew, I'll miss our banter, I'll fondly remember the whole 'Nooch' escapades and I'll miss the odd coffees and meaningful chats we used to have but you can be sure I'll be coming to see you. All that remains to be said is good luck to you and your lovely partner!

And here is the man himself!

So... What's New?

It's been a month of conflicting emotions combined with highs and lows health wise. Time spent in Nottingham continues to bring issues within society to the forefront of my mind. It's very much an ongoing bitter-sweet experience really.

It's been a fairly quiet month with lots of thinking going on and a fair few weekends staying at home over going out. I've decided to overhaul my often self indulgent diet a bit and go for more fish, pasta, rice and veg and leave bread and other fatty things alone, not easy as I love a good sandwich and like things like cheese.

At the beginning of the month I thought I may have been into something with someone but alas after a period of being really happy and with a spring in my step I don't think it's something that is going to happen. Probably, well mainly because of inflexible stuff, shadows from the past (not on my part) and the fact some people find it hard to compromise really, myself included yet I was really willing to on this one. It's hard when someone comes into your life again and suddenly beams sunshine into it then silly things become issues, issues become silence and silence becomes a wedge that is hard to overcome. I am not without faults of course but I do think when someone special comes along these days it's worth the extra effort. Though I am content being single at times I worry I may become stuck in my ways and when I ask myself do I want to grow old and alone? the resounding answer is no, though I don't fear it either. We've all been hurt in the past but nowadays I don't want to let my past dictate my future, I know others struggle with memories but when you look at good and bad memories which should be the easiest to put in the trash can?

On the plus front I've been planning my new blog site which has a specific subject matter in mind and I've been reading a lot, humanism stuff, existentialism and a generous dollop of fiction too! I've rediscovered what a great little resource my local library really is.

Tv Of The Month

It's not been a bad month for tv really. The Apprentice has been in full swing on BBC1, Wednesday 9pm. The thing is, I feel the Apprentice is becoming tired and formulaic. There's only so many times panoramic camera views of London (especially the Gherkin building) can have appeal. The tasks on the show remain the same with little change. The contestants are as usual mostly loathsome ego maniacs yet I still watch the show, mainly because I love Sir Alan's aide 'Nick Hewer' who has me rolling with laughter with his facial gesticulations and quips. Karen Brady is also a great asset to the team and I really like her blunt honesty. The show does need some changes though, maybe longer tasks or more trips abroad BBC?

Second up is the back to back programs of Four In A Bed and Come Dine With Me on Channel 4 5-6pm respectively. Great irreverent virtual reality shows with plenty of typical Brit humour, I never take the shows seriously but then that is the general idea - an ideal bit of teatime nonsense with laughs.

Lastly my favourite program of the month. This was a documentary presented by the award winning fantasy author Terry Pratchett, a thoroughly lovely man. The documentary called 'Choosing to Die' was aired on BBC2 on June 13th an was about assisted suicide. I really find words hard to find to describe the impact this program had on me. It was a reminder of my mother that died several years ago when I consented to her life support machine being switched off. All the memories came flooding back but the way Terry Pratchett presented this sensitive subject was objective in general context (not subjectively about Mr Pratchett), balanced and very touching. As he rightly quotes in my opinion 'The timing of his death should be his choice and not the governments'. Of course Terry Pratchett's thoughts and feelings were evident but I felt as a viewer the program looked beyond his personal views and looked at the subject matter from different perspectives.

It was a compelling piece of powerful television and I haven't seen anything that has evoked that much raw emotion in me for some time. I feel strongly for assisted suicide if of course there is no doubt in peoples minds that because of disease, pain and declining health issues that their quality of life is no longer there. It's a contentious subject for sure but one I feel the government needs to address and the church needs to stay out of. Great television from the BBC. You can find a review of the program here.

Song Of The Month

I've been quite eclectic with my listening this month though I've generally been listening favourite stuff whilst out and about. I did hear this track on the radio last week and loved it straight away so I will put it down as this months song even though I don't know much about the artist (but intend to!). So here it is with Lykke Li and 'Rich Kid Blues'.

Primal Scream At Glastonbury

Just watched the Primal Scream set at Glastonbury and was blown away. In comparison I thought U2 were a bit bland. Don't get me wrong I like quite a bit of U2 stuff but they just didn't work for me this time. On the other hand Primal Scream totally rocked, probably about the only band I'd want to see live there in this years poor line up. I'll admit to being a bit cynical about Glastonbury, maybe because I'm older and feel festival stuff is behind me, I need my creature comforts and to be honest my arthritic pain would just flare up with the damp and rain. So for me, I get a front of stage seat in my living room and enjoy it that way, plus I don't have to queue up at a porta-loo either! I'm sure the Glastonbury experience is amazing and maybe one day I might suffer the pain and go especially as the Arcadia area looks amazing with all the electro and psytrance stuff going on.

To see the BBC highlights of Primal Scream click 'Here'

Crazy Day

I should have known today was going to be a crazy day when a pigeon tried getting through the curtains into my bedroom at 6am. I was startled by its warbling noises and movements and it was evidently trying to get in somehow, well I am three floors up, and I shouldn't complain as I don't get many birds in my bedroom these days! Some shouting and arm waving saw it on its way and it was time to rise. Time for a brew of earl grey tea, choccy biscuit and a quick chat with my friend Gary on Msn who is over in China.

Off to Nottingham on the train and I find myself sat opposite a largish framed woman with a pretty face dressed in a suit. I think to myself she probably works in an office at a building site and ironically at that moment she pulls out a construction magazine from her rucksack. I duck behind my free copy of the Metro newspaper and grin broadly.

The morning passes without real event. I do a pitch run out of the office to see if vendors want a top up of magazines whilst listening to Infected Mushroom and admiring the multitudes of eye candy Nottingham has to offer. Popping into to Forbidden Planet I bag something for a friends birthday and head back to the office to talk Game of Thrones with Holly.

As I head home there's a brooding air about Nottingham as the clouds hang darkly in the air, threatening to rain at any moment. 'Come on rain' I think as I really want the people at the Glastonbury festival to get wet this coming week. Coming to the crossing at Lower Parliament street I notice black guy acting erratically, talking to himself, sudden head movements and a restless demeanor. Nearby an old couple are looking nervously around, the clouds go dimmer and as we cross they take a sudden change of direction. It's obvious to me the coloured guy has mental health problems, I'd say he was approaching his late 20's dressed smart yet casual with a smallish affro haircut. He trails his finger along a window of a restaurant as we approach Cranbrook Street crossing then BOOM! He violently kicks the window of a restaurant and I'm shocked it didn't go through. Next he brings the flat of his hand down on a dustbin lid, water sprays off it and hits an oncoming young woman in the face and chest, the black guy seems oblivious to this and walks on shouting with pumped up vitriol at imaginary people. Having worked with mental health people I say to myself this man is off the scale and almost definitely dangerous, possibly exacerbated by drugs. I look at the young girl and shrug and she complains to me at what he's done. Before I can say 'Leave it, he is off his head or has serious mental stuff going on' she turns and shouts abuse.

An odd surreal pause moment follows and he turns around and begins to follow her, I avoid eye contact as he again smacks the window and sends the dustbin hurtling over with a kick. I ask myself 'Do I want to die?' and the answer 'Not today' spills out of my mind. He walks after her quickly shouting incoherently and I figure as she is walking towards lots of burly builders doing roadworks she should be safe (as they could floor him better than a hobbit like me could). I pause momentarily and wander what to do but as I promised myself I'd buy the Game of Thrones book 2 today and want to read it I consider walking on the best course of action! The best thing the young girl should do is walk on swiftly and say nothing more as I know how unpredictable and dangerous people with mental health issues can be. I'm no coward by any means but the mantra of the mental health place I used to work out kicks in and that was basically if they ever kick off - get out of there fast'.

Climbing the hill into Hockley I soon see two female community police officers (not really much bigger than me) and swiftly tell them what just transpired. Before I can really mention too much they are off to investigate and that's really the end of things from my perspective.

Walking into Waterstones books I'm engulfed by the calmness of the place, I find my book with ease and peruse it. Suddenly a book drops down from above me and clatters on the floor making me jump slightly, especially I my nerves are jangling a little after previous events. Book purchased I head towards the train station and berate myself as I was going to get the book online for £5 and this is £3 more but as I have a Waterstones card its not all bad as my credit goes up.

Skittering through the Broadmarsh centre I notice a guy walking towards me, his eyes narrow and he stares fixedly at me. 'Here we go again' I say to myself as I turn my head to still see him looking at me but then an instant feeling of recognition kicks in and I remember him from a pub I frequented long ago. 'Simon isn't it?' I enquire and he smiles and nods as I breathe a sigh of relief. We stop and chat discussing old times and how we've both done over the years, it's good to see him again.

Slumping into a seat and breathing hard as I nearly missed the train I open my bag and get the book out, it's called 'A Clash of Kings' by George R.R Martin. The train speeds home back to my quiet town and I hope to myself the crazy stuff is over for one day.

Following On

Following on from my recent 'Atheist Junction' blog and the feedback I got from it I've had a think and decided on which direction I want to go. People messaged me on Facebook, email or spoke to me on the phone and the resounding feeling is they think I should carry on with the blog as it is. I don't think people mind blogs on my feelings regarding religious issues but felt I was doing exactly the same as my pro-religious counterparts in putting my opinions forth.

There's no doubt I totally see this angle and I personally felt my staunch viewpoints were taking over a bit and detracting a little to what my blog is generally all about. On a frank note though, my opinions and views are something I feel passionate about, most people have a cause out there they feel strongly about from poverty to politics or even just supporting their local hospital or chosen research group - the list is endless.

I think the best route for me to go down is to do another blog, maybe on a different website with a new format, after all there's so many websites out there these days designed for blogging so it'll be good to try a new one. There's still going to be blogs on here about my thoughts on Atheism, Humanist stuff and religion but they'll be markedly less.

Thanks to everyone that took time to give me some feedback be it on Facebook, email, the phone or in person.

Thoughts On E3 Expo 2011

So, the latest E3 Expo show in Los Angeles has been and gone. I've watched a fair few videos from the event and as always it's exciting to see new technology showcased. I have to confess this year though for the first time instead of my usual fervour I have actually questioned certain announcements or pieces of tech, mainly gaming tech.

First up is the new Nintendo Wii U announced at the E3 to great excitement. I've always loved Nintendo stuff and have much of their back catalogue myself. With Nintendo there ought to be the kind of mission statement along the lines of 'with great risks there are great gains' which mostly is very true on their part as they are a company that pioneer innovation. The new Wii U however left me asking lots of questions and instead of my usual excitement I felt quite vexed and a little let down. It's supposed to be a controller and a console but also seems to have an identity crisis going on too! Now, this said I may be wrong when the actual Wii U comes into play but until then I can only go on the concept videos, 'concept' being the important word here at the moment.

So what is the Wii U? I really don't know, Nintendo state it's not a handheld yet it clearly resembles one and is gripped very much like a large portable console. Nostalgia filled my mind when I saw it of the old Sega Gamegear and Atari Lynx, both portable consoles but quite large! Back to subject, so watching the concept video, though impressed I was left with lots of questions such as to its connectivity, the media it will use and how it generally interacts with the other piece of kit. After pondering these questions yet more questions arose, and the next day some of the media seemed sceptical as one critic remarked Nintendo had invented something for problems that didn't exist. In some respects he was right, the video of the Wii U opens with someone wanting to use the Tv and the other person switching his game from the Tv to the Wii U. A great idea for sure but look at how many kids of today have Tv's in their own room!? It struck me that the new Wii is being vaunted as a kind of jack of all trades for the home but master of none. You can surf the web, it has a touch screen, you can make video calls on it and so on, very versatile but seeing as people already use laptops and touch tablets for this kind of stuff already then is there really a need for more of the same?

Whilst I am sceptical about the Wii I am not going to dismiss it just yet, it would be silly to do so but I do feel the whole idea at present seems blurred as to what exactly it is and as I stated to a friend, not all new ideas have to be good ones (the new Nintendo 3D has had problems). I do really want it to be good but it just seems to be much of what everyone else is doing at present with the whole motion sensor / touch screen thing. I guess I was hoping Nintendo would do a high end gamers console going back to their roots a little and also a new high spec portable console though we seem to have an odd combination of both that is also integral to Nintendo's existing Wii kit (allegedly).

Next up is the new Sony Portable called the 'Vita' though I gather it had a couple of different names before it was unveiled at the E3. I'm really not keen on the 'Vita' tag, it just conjures up images of breakfast cereal or slimming products for some reason. What I see with the Sony's new offering, like Nintendo is very much in line with what has been released so far, it looks very Sony as the new Wii U looks Nintendo. I guess both companies have a brand and style and feel safe with the product and imagery and neither want to upset the consumers by doing something that looks too different. The Vita looks like the existing psp range, on a glance you could be mistaken for thinking its just a new Psp, after all we've had a few of them so far. Sony seem to have gone for touch screen technology as well, after all its very 'en vogue' at the moment. On the positive side both Sony and Nintendo machines have buttons and controllers beside touch screen capability unlike Apple who try and fool us that their stuff is also ideal for ardent gamers out there, trust me it isn't. My problem with touch screen stuff on the Apple range is fun games aside, that your hand always seems to be in the field of vision and touching a screen is never as responsive as a button. Gary my friend in Hong Kong always tries to sell the idea of an ipod/ipad as a gaming console of sorts and it never washes with me, whilst they are fun and look aesthetically good, gaming dedicated gaming devices they'll never be. Anyway, I digress, back to Sony. So their new Vita is all singing and dancing, front and back camera's, rear touch pad (not screen) and front fascia adorned with buttons and again a touch screen. I'm pretty much a Sony fan boy make no mistake but after a range of Psps including the Psp light, 3000 and Psp Go the new Vita just seems like much of the same with added bells and whistles. The new Sony/Ericsson phone/console isn't doing too well I hear and is very expensive so I wonder how Sony will fare with the new Vita?

Maybe it's just me these days that feels a little de-sensitised to the new stuff when back in the day things seem to have had a more wow factor. I recall getting really excited about the Game Boy Advance clam shell handheld and I wasn't disappointed, I still cherish it now. We seem to be in a period now where things seem slightly static and the next big things are yet to come, you only have to watch programs like the Gadget Show to see that devices that replicate true 3D or are controlled by thought are on the horizon. I saw some head gadget at the E3 that gave each eye a different perspective on a driving simulator to make you feel like everything was real and 3D around you and you could turn your head 360 degrees too. Voice recognition also seems to be vastly improving these days so I expect we'll see more of that in the future. The fact is with the new stuff these days is that I am a little bit old school in some respects, whilst I love new stuff I do like my buttons on things, especially when playing games as repeatedly touching a screen with a thumb doesn't feel that convincing to me. I don't think being old school is a bad thing, on the contrary it shows a healthy respect for the past and games that got us here today yet whilst I will always embrace future good ideas I will always remember good solid gaming experiences from the old days.

So that's a few thoughts on things, and in fairness regarding the new stuff a lot remains to be seen and I've no doubt what is coming our way in future months will be good.

For a link to E3 preview stuff including the new Sony and Nintendo items click 'here'.

At An Atheists Junction

Lately several blogs have been about religion and my feelings on the subject. I'm starting to feel my blogs on religious issues are taking over slightly and when I started my blog all those years ago I'd no idea my feelings on such a subject matter would grow so strong and defined. The last thing I want is people to look in and think 'Oh he's ranting about religion again ... I'll move on'. Religion of course is a contentious subject at best, most people tend to avoid it if possible and the old adage of never discuss religion and politics if you want to avoid crossing swords with someone is still very relevant.

The thing is I feel strongly about it, I feel compelled to blog about the evils of organised religion and my feelings on it. If anything over the last couple of years has been my calling or indeed cause I feel it's to actively take the fight back to the 'God-botherers' out there and make them see common practical sense.

Realistically speaking I am no Christopher Hitchens, Daniel Dennett or Stephen Hawking, I'm just a little fella who is probably passable at writing and has the odd articulate written or verbal flourish. To move forward with my whole heartfelt feelings on it I probably need to take it another step and perhaps start a more dedicated blog on such subject matter. I've been musing over the idea for a while, perhaps even doing a blog that is also a forum for others to contribute of the same mind as I know you can adjust the settings on here for mulitple people to post.

I have lots of ideas and much to say but I also realise that sometimes things are better debated to see it from different viewpoints before perhaps taking it forward. More reading is needed for sure and more verbal debating though I do realise that by verbal debating I may well lose a few before I get better. When it comes to debating I can be very good albeit it on a day when I feel 'up for it' shall we say, there's some days I just don't feel eloquent at all. Life gives you many skills that aren't always evident at the time but learned wisdom from experience can often be a clincher I've found. Rushing in and attempting to sound good can often backfire especially if you don't know your stuff or think about your wording. I'm more measured these days, though of course still make plenty of mistakes, though not as many as I did in my impetuous youth. Successive past jobs have furnished me with quite a bit even if I didn't realise it. I like to think I appraise things more fully these days and feel more tempered in many areas. I'm not feeling super confident here as I know there is an infinite amount of stuff to absorb in life and should I want to take my feelings about religion further then I need to read more, understand more and try and hone myself mentally, verbally and ensure my written stuff improves too. A fair bit of credit must go to my Psychology diploma studies a few years back as some of the content of that experience was personal development as well as learning the academic side. Life has shaped who I am now and despite past troubles I've always fought through. Reflecting back to my younger days I can see how naive and blinkered I was yet I can also credit myself that at an early age, despite my physical stature I'd promised myself I would never be a silent wall flower.

I know my limitations but I really want to try and get the man in the streets opinion across and show that it can be sensible and pragmatic. Oxford professor I'll never ever be because I'm just not that intelligent but I hope in my heart that I can take these strong feelings I have forward and get my pragmatic points across.

Moving ahead with this is something I feel really passionate or I wouldn't be here blogging about it. I want to unfurl a banner of sorts, I want to take it to the overbearing organised religious types that want to convert, brainwash and control that times are changing and that we can be perfectly moral without words uttered, written and re-written by ignorant men long ago that are still used to stop our growth as free thinking beings today.

So, a new different blog may well in the making as I kind of want the Hobbit's Journal to go back to what it once was which is mainly irrelevant musings and happenings often badly written by an ageing day dreaming generally happy hobbit (who is sometimes cynical and often pragmatic!).

I will now slip into a state of Che Guevarra/Winston Chruchil type reverie !

Lotro: The Journey Goes Ever On

A good few months have dropped off the calendar since I started playing Lord of the Rings online, abbreviated in the gaming community to 'Lotro'. Its been a great experience and lots of fun and I've met some fantastic new people, mostly American but the group or kinship as it's known that I hang out with has members in it from all around the world, so no bad thing.

Content is always being added to the game, much of it is free to play and when you do purchase something you feel you are getting value for money. I've a feeling I'll still be engrossed in the online version of Middle Earth come Christmas and beyond. Anyway, here are some screen shots from the game of late (geek alert!).

Good To See

Last week I was walking for my train when ahead I saw two men holding hands. I was behind them for a good while and I'm pleased to say nobody in Nottingham gave them a second glance. Had it been a smaller provincial town then I'm sure the reaction would have been much different. I mentioned it to my friend Adam who has recently moved to Nottingham and we both came to the conclusion that despite evident problems Nottingham is a very cool multicultural tolerant place. Whilst I am not gay myself I can never get my head around the fact that gay people should be mocked or discriminated at for being who they are, it is wrong on every level. I've always found gay or lesbian people to be warm, genuine, witty, strong in character and never without opinion.

I smiled inside when I saw the two young guys holding hands and its great to see such things in today's society, though sadly not everywhere yet, one day hopefully.

Well Voted Malta

Malta is a place I like, the people are lovely, it's steeped history and it has a certain charm that is hard to explain. I've only been to Malta twice, last year in fact, yet I want to return and understand the people and the place even more. I noticed last week in the news that through a referendum the people had voted in favour of divorce, being one of a handful of countries left where divorce wasn't yet legal, though a legal separation could be granted after some time I believe.

I realise Malta is a staunchly catholic country but its good to see them moving forward and making decisions for a more secular future and not fettered by past religious chains.

Oh The Irony

I was up bright and early this morning, my mobile phone that acts as alarm had died on me battery wise yet my body clock told me it was time to rise. On retiring in the early hours I suspected a restless night because of the heat but had slept soundly for a few hours and was only 20 minutes later getting out of bed after the alarm was set for. The reason I wanted to be up fairly early was to catch the post, usually the postman comes between 9am and 11am, rings the intercom but doesn't generally hang around so you have to be nimble.

Having ordered a book online a few days ago entitled 'The Portable Atheist' by Christopher Hitchens I was eager to get my hands on it and have some quality reading time. Come 9:45am the buzzer on the intercom startles me into action, I'm sat at the PC with a cup of Twinnings tea and trot along to answer the intercom before descending the stairs to collect my book, however it doesn't turn out to be the postman!

A polite female voice answers my greeting with 'I have some leaflets I'd like you to read regarding how mankind is destroying the planet'. Well as Mankind is allegedly created by god, then by default I'd say god is culpable to a fair degree.

I pause and think to myself, is this the Green party or is it as my gut feeling is telling me - something far more sinister.

Following the brief pause she adds 'The leaflets detail a meeting next week in Nottingham to discuss how we can look to god to save us from all of this'.

At this point there's a a chagrin expression on my face as I really wanted the postman to be at the other end and not some religious fanatic. My mind at this point splits into two post disappointment thoughts. The first is to invite her in, debate with her and get my own back for it not being the posty. The second is I'm glad I have an intercom because should I feel so inclined, I don't have to engage in verbal battle. I decide to take a polite route and tell her to post the stuff through the letterbox and pretty much close the conversation at that.

Later I venture downstairs and my hunch is proved very much correct as I note the literature, it was the Jehovah's Witnesses, it was either them or the towns Methodists but the latter stick to rhetoric on the market place whilst the Witnesses of course have no qualms on doorstep brain washing. Their sienna shaded leaflets all look the same really, artwork of a perfect family walking in a Utopian world with biblical quotes. I cast my eyes over the text 'Gods kingdom will come and we will show you how it will be transformed into paradise - and how you can qualify to live there'.

Notice the catch right at the end of the sentence? The bit where you have to qualify? This of course seems odd as all the Jehovah's Witnesses allocation slots to gods big holiday camp in the alleged afterlife (or after-lie?) have been in the past touted as a first come-first served basis with strictly limited numbers (144,000 and as there are a reported 7 million or so members worldwide its not going to be easy for a ticket!).

So, ironically no 'Portable Atheist' book today but a visit from a cultist, oh well!