That My Lad Was... A Dragon

The new The Hobbit - The Desolation of Smaug trailer has at last arrived, enjoy!

All The Power In The World

In the 1994 movie The Crow, the main protagonist 'Top Dollar' says 'All the power in the world resides in the eyes'. He wasn't wrong, just recently I found out the very reality of those words.

Having had trouble with my eyes I ended up at the eye casualty at the local main hospital in Nottingham. A few days after I got to see a specialist. The news wasn't good, as I sat there he frankly told me the realities and that because having had so much eye surgery in the past they couldn't do any more. If they did they may be in danger of undoing all the surgery gone before and actually going into the eye to rectify the problem was unthinkable, in fact he refused to do it, adding 'if you gave offered me millions in cash - I'd refuse'. Part of me didn't want to hear what he was telling me, I'd read up on things, I thought it would be possible to remove the problem but no. I came out of the room feeling crushed, eyes dilated through drops the white lit corridors of the hospital seemed bright, almost dreamy, I had to wake up. Putting my sunglasses on the doctors words echoed in my mind, my problem would get worse, only if I had a detached retina could he go in and remove the vitreous gel floating around in my eye, but then the gel itself was causing problems already and could be the cause of future problems. There seemed no solution. If the gel didn't cause problems the retina would probably detach, blindness was very much a future possibility.

Vision blurred I made for the main exit, peoples voices seemed like echoes and I was consumed in thought, a stray tear escaped, my mouth quivered slightly and I bit down hard to bring myself under control. The gel in my eye swam around making my already distorted vision seem like I was underwater. 

On the train home I felt empty, surely they could sort it out, medicine is so good these days right? No. Medicine can only do so much, it can't repair everything, the reality hit me like train colliding with the one I was on. The journey back seemed to take moments, I had music on my mp3 player but it was merely background noise, the exterior of the train seemed removed, it just felt like me sat on a seat traversing the local fields, alone.

I got home, stumbled through town on auto-pilot and immediately went to bed. I slept soundly, wanting the eye drops to fade in potency. I woke, lay there and suddenly tears coursed down my face.

And now, days after hearing this? I feel ok, still deflated but getting stronger daily. The mood of 'I can't do anything' has been replaced by 'I can do anything I want and why worry?'. As the legendary general Hannibal once said 'I will either find a way or make one'.

May hasn't been an easy month, I suspect harder months are to come but I'm not yet ready to yield to darkness.

The Thatcher Years and Me

Margaret Thatcher has died today. I grew up in the Thatcher years being then around 12 years old when she was elected, I was rapidly approaching my mid twenties when she was ousted ... by her own political party. 

In my early childhood days I was probably a little bit oblivious to it all though it my early teens it was evident musicians at the time had a strong dislike for her (Billy Bragg, The Specials etc) as did many of the comedians on tv, Ben Elton immediately springs to mind. There is no denying Thatcher is a cultural icon of the 1980s but maybe not in a good way. I'll always recall Rik Mayall's anti Thatcher quips on The Young Ones.

My family were working class and had mixed fortunes during the Thatcher years, I'd say they steadily improved but that was through the hard work of my parents and not the successive Thatcher governments. I called in to see my dad today and asked him what he thought of the Thatcher years, he replied flatly 'Our mortgage doubled in cost'.

Reflecting back I can only convey here what I really remember and that was leaving school and going on the YTS (Youth Training Scheme) as my parents couldn't afford to finance me staying on at school or going to college. The YTS of course was very low paid labour but fortunately I managed to get on a scheme working with computers which was more training than work. It soon became evident that promises of a job through the scheme were merely transparent, I became restless, somewhat rebellious (I was still young and naive) and left the scheme to join another hopeless one. Fortunately during this time my parents didn't charge me board and lodgings, stating they wanted me to get used to having some money of my own and encouraged me to save and budget for my own clothing etc. The YTS scheme was in reality smoke and mirrors exercise, few gained jobs from it, though I do know people that did, however its main purpose was to lower unemployment figures.

Later of course, when I'd got a relatively low paid factory job the Poll Tax (also known as the community charge) came into effect and I saw my earnings plummet to pay some stupid tax even though I was still living with my parents. I refused to pay, as did hundreds of thousands of others and rioting occurred in some towns. I went to court and stood there with scores of others who'd refused. It was either pay or face the consequences so many of us agreed to pay the bare minimum. Soon after it was replaced and Thatchers reign ended.

Of course I recall other instances throughout her time as Prime Minister. The Falklands war in which a nation suddenly realised we had tiny islands thousands of miles away even though hardly anyone had heard of them beforehand. At the time I was probably patriotic and I remember the vivid images of sinking ships, burnt soldiers and the news reports on tv. I also recall riots in London and Bristol in deprived areas. I remember the miners strike and being spat at whilst leaving school and called a 'scab' by Yorkshire miners who had come to picket Crown Farm colliery mine and were encamped in a nearby pub before causing chaos. I wasn't the son of a miner but both my grandparents were miners so I have a mining background and I'm proud of it too. Thatcher divided Yorkshire and Nottinghamshire miners, a rift that is still apparent today. The epilogue to the strike was the unions were crushed (always a plan of Thatcher) and whole towns and communities were ruined. Nottinghamshire miners were favoured short term by the Thatcher government but in time their mines became no more and the local miners although receiving a period of prosperity followed by good pay off's found that getting work after was very difficult. The end of the mines saw the town where I used to live wither and slowly die, after the mines went other industries toppled and promises of cash injections never really appeared. A once thriving happy town seemingly capitulated, I witnessed its death, it affected me, I was there, it should have never have happened. Before the miners strike there always seemed to be work even low paid work, after it declined rapidly.

Can I say anything good about Thatcher? A strong leader or bully? All I can say is I liked the way she stood up to Europe and the then early makings of the European Union, that's about it really. Its fair to say life in the Thatcher years wasn't all bad, as a family we slowly prospered though I know my parents had periodic tough times. I recall the era well probably because as Thatcher came to power I was reaching that age where I took more notice, went to school, left school, struggled to find work and saw many social changes and influences. The Thatcher years will be always etched on my mind and shape how I think today.

In closing I don't think her legacy is a good one, though many will argue otherwise. She encouraged privatisation and private health. She divided communities and further widened the north-south divide. She crushed unions without mercy and destroyed what they'd spent years achieving. Manufacturing went to cheaper firms abroad. The coal mining industry was laid to waste. Deregulation of banks, social unrest, VAT from 8% to 17.5% etc etc, I could go on.

She died today in the Ritz Hotel where of course only the rich can afford to die in.

Dog Ignorance

Dogs seem to be in the news again, and its not good news either. there was an incident last week in the town where I live in which one dog killed another in the town centre, today in the news its dogs killing a teenage girl.

I'm not going to lie here, I dislike dogs. This comes from having been once attacked by two large dogs whilst walking to work some years ago and being bitten once in the face by an Alsation breed of dog on another occasion. This has of course made me wary of dogs and with good reason.

I'm a libertarian in many ways when it comes to social freedoms but I really feel we need to start cracking down on dogs and seriously revising laws regarding them. It wasn't so long ago there was a call to clamp down and cull foxes for attacking a baby (lets remember they are wild animals) yet we remain complacent about dogs. I still recall watching a video last year of a dog attacking and seriously injuring police officers, it turned my stomach to watch.

We place too much emphasis and importance on 'pets' these days, especially dogs. People have dogs for many reasons but we have to admit many of these reasons are wrong. More often these days people have them for vanity, emotional needs, company, dog fighting, breeding for money or just to keep up with the neighbours. A person may have a dog for company, yet ironically be out at work all day leaving the dog alone. Many have dogs as family pets then realise they don't have time or inclination to look after them as burgeoning dog rescue centres can attest to. The sad fact is people take dogs for granted and thus over time we elevated them to be almost a fundamental part of our lives without even thinking about it. 

Now, I understand reasons why people have dogs, unless it is for fighting or breeding even more fearsome ones, this though has become seemingly a core part of many of the underclass, a dog is more a status symbol than a pet. Though it may sound harsh I think from a practical perspective that dogs should be ideally used for airports, police, rescue and farms etc. Outside of that if people want dogs then they should be licensed, chipped and costly. I hear people gasp but surely if you genuinely want a dog then you'd be happy to pay for it? In the same sense as if people genuinely want a type of car or expensive piece of jewellery they'll pay for it. The problem these days is that dogs are readily available. This causes problems as its going to be almost impossible to police. Ok, so the government are bringing in new laws to chip dogs but will this seriously be enough? People always say 'Oh my dog never bites anyone its a softy!' until of course it does then it's 'well its not like my dog, its completely out of character'. Lets be clear, dogs are animals and thus (surprise surprise) on occasion act like animals, especially with others when a pack mentality sets in, where other dogs will blindly follow a pack leader no matter how much its owners have it down as domesticated.

We have a massive ignorance towards a growing dog problem in this country and until we get tough on dog owners then it won't subside. We take dogs for granted, as a given right. I know the majority of dog owners are responsible ones, we don't see as much dog faeces gracing the streets as we used but that said its still around.

What the government needs to do to avoid attacks, dog fighting, dangerous breeds and such is to begin clamping down and introduce harsh sentences. On top of that it needs to introduce dog licences, a national dog database, chipping and urge sellers and breeders to sell them at a premium preferably taxable. If people genuinely wanted dogs then they'd do the above.

In closing I'm sorry if my views sound harsh but I can't help the way I feel about it, and that's very strongly.

Everlasting Winter

This winter feels like it has lasted forever. Usually people say winter is never over until February is out of the way but this year February came and went, was very cold and now at the end of March we seem firmly entrenched in winter still. Suffering with a severe arthritic condition makes the cold no fun for me at all. I'm reluctant to put the heating on as its so expensive these days but sometimes I just think to hell with the bill and put it on, pain it seems tips the balance over cost when the cold is really biting. I dread to think what large fuel bills families have? In winter my bill usually comes in around £300 quarterly and I avoid using it as much as possible. I layer up clothing wise, even sometimes wear a hat, my apartment being on the top floor seemingly is colder in winter yet hot in summer, ideally I need to look at relocating.

I recall about a decade or so ago gas and electric seemed relatively cheap, stretching my mind back I think my bills came in around £80 for a quarter and it always seemed to be on in winter. How times change and how the fuel companies have been consumed with greed. of course the governments remarks about it yet nothing seems to be done, no surprises really.

These days the gap between rich and poor is becoming ever more apparent. The current government seems determined to purge the poor. Benefits are being slashed whilst living costs rise. It even seems that you see more poor people these days, its evident just by the way they are dressed, added to the fact we seem to have an increasing amount of lower class Eastern Europeans on the streets, if you haven't seen social changes then my guess is that your head must be buried in the sand, you're rich and oblivious to it, or you just choose to ignore it as it doesn't really concern you. The reality today is that the world is a changing place, in fact its been changing quite rapidly for a while now when you stop and take stock of things. I've taken to watching different news channels to get a broader picture of what's happening around the UK and around the world. As for the press? Well most of the British press is odious and predictable. Right wing tabloids often putting spin on stories to divide society even more. 

Despondent? Not really, I just seem to have an increasing awareness to the reality of how things are changing and not for the better. Right now though I want winter to end, for the pain and stiffness in my joints to subside and for rays of sun to shine through. This winter has slowed me down. which of course has slowed my plans down, the claws of the cold weather seemingly place curses on my ambition.

Iconic Kraftwerk

I'm not exactly sure how long I've loved the German band Kraftwerk. Having had a long search of my memory I suspect it was back around when I was 15, so around 1983 or possibly a bit later. Sitting in a small box room playing on my Sinclair ZX Spectrum I'd listen to music cassettes when games had loaded in. Though I was influenced by lots of different sorts of music electronic and synthesiser music were rapidly becoming favourites. On leaving school and getting a relatively low paid job I persuaded my mother to sign a credit agreement so I could get into debt buying a keyboard. I think it cost around £125 and in truth wasn't that good or professional added to the fact I was poor at playing it. In time the keyboard got sold but my love of electronic remained, it was the 1980s after all and such music was flourishing.

So to the present day. Kraftwerk are still touring and remain enigmatic and iconic in the music world. Only last week they played a series of concerts in the Tate Modern in London in which they played entire albums over several nights. I was caught napping regarding the announcement and was too late to get a ticket, so unfortunately I've missed them ... again. I still have some of their stuff on vinyl including a 12" luminescent version of 'Neon Lights' and many cd's.

Added to my woes there have been some amazing reviews, two of which are  here and here. One day I may get to see them though it would have been fantastic to have seen them in their formative years with the original line up. Here's a video of one of my favourite tracks called 'Numbers' though live with the extra bass sounds even more awesome, I have it on a cd somewhere, sadly YouTube losses some of the sound (but is still good).

In Search Of Gandalf

London, it's a strange old place. I've been going to there for quite a while now. Almost lived and worked there once, and truth be said I would have liked to have done so, for a while at least, not so sure nowadays. These days London still fascinates me yet alienates me too, it's a city of stark contrasts some of which draw me back and some that make me loathe it.

So anyway, London once again. This planned trip had been pulling me through the mundane days of the Christmas period. Friday the 11th soon came around and I was speeding towards the capital with fellow local online gamer and casual friend James to meet other online gamers from Lord of the Rings Online or Lotro for short. In truth it was only ever going to be a fleeting visit to meet, socialise and fit whatever we could in, so very ad hoc really. That said a loose plan of sorts was in place. 

As the patchwork of fields blinked passed I chatted to James in what seemed an almost empty carriage, an alternative ghost train being that is it was bereft of the usual hubbub of voices. Within no time the train was groaning to a halt at Kings Cross and after topping our oyster cards up we headed down to the underground and towards Oxford Street. The purpose of this was twofold, firstly I wanted to check out a pair of shoes from nearby Berwick Street in Soho and secondly were going to meet the third of our merry band of geeks called Alan who had travelled in from Cardiff. We soon chanced upon the shoe shop called 'Underground' though James spotted it before I did but my field of vision has never been wide. Whilst I tried a few pairs of 50s retro style shoes on James waited outside and was approached by a woman asking if he wanted 'ladies?', no shocks really as we were at the bottom end of Soho which is known for its seedier elements. Shoes bagged and I was a very happy hobbit, Alan had texted to say he'd arrived and as we were central we decided to hole up in a pub called The Blue Posts and await him. Two pints for very unremarkable beer wasn't cheap, £9 something as I recall but this is the heart of London so I expected nothing less, though was still quite taken aback. Alan soon arrived, greetings made and another pint and we decided to head over Shaftesbury Avenue and into China town for a cheap buffet meal before heading to the hotel. Passable buffet over we hit the underground and arrived at Southwark station which seemed quite new in appearance.

I've stayed in a fair few Travelodges in London but have to say this was the best so far. It was located down a quieter side street literally 3 mins walk from the underground, had a couple of pubs nearby though we only sampled one called 'The Ring' (very apt for Lord of the Rings fans). nestled underneath the Travelodge were a 24/7 convenience store and a very nice but reasonably priced cafe, so facility wise everything was good. The room itself was standard cheap hotel fare, clean and with a spacious walk in shower. 

That evening after a rest and freshening up we headed up to Camden Town. This was my idea but nobody had any other ideas and my logic being that Camden is a relatively small area with a good selection of pubs more suited to our age and not too expensive. In good spirits we moved from pub to pub starting at the Elephants Head before moving to the Hawley Arms and heading further down the High Street to a pub I thought was there but has either closed or been refurbed. Looking at old Google Street maps it's there as the Monarch which I visited with my friend Jane once. James quipped we were running out of Camden but seeing as he had no ideas himself we trekked back down the High street and decided to try a bar that looked ok from the outside and had comfy chairs. We were promptly stopped by a doorman who was asking a couple for identification and who seemed well into their twenties. I flatly refused to give my ID as I'm 40 something and a quick rack of my memory made me realise this was the first time I'd been asked my age since I was around 17, that being back in the mid 1980's. We strolled back down the street and my new shoes were beginning to chafe somewhat but a girl in her twenties shouted I was cute and also a 'teddy boy' (1950s rocker type) which made me smile, though I'm only the shoes were from that time period fashion wise. Next pub up was the Oxford Arms and we managed to get a table so stopped for a couple there, I had a hip flask in my pocket filled with Jack Daniels (for medicinal purposes!) so had a bit of a secret top up. Next we headed down Inverness Street to the Good Mixer, a perennial favourite of mine and a great lively pub. Alan was a gent and asked how my feet were holding. The Good Mixer was crowded to say the least and Alan remarked the name was very fitting as it was a very mixed crowd of people to say the least. James who usually drinks quite fast and then turns into a zombie seemed to be ok too, so all was well. We ended the night in Bucks Head where some guy was trying to wash his hair and then dry it under a dryer in a very cramped washroom. Then we got the tube back. At Southwark we noticed the station barriers were out of order so we couldn't check out using the oyster cards, so we got charged the maximum amount for the journey next day, not good. Arriving back near the hotel no local pubs were open which I found a bit of a shock being the capital and all that. So procuring a snack from the 24/7 shop it was time for some tv and then sleep, a good night had by all.

I was up early the next day and peering out of the window I noticed we had a good view of the new Shard building that seemed to reach skywards almost puncturing the grey clouds. I ached from the previous day, my joints reminded me London always takes it out of me. After a very good breakfast we headed into central London on foot to meet yet more geeks, one who was over from America called Jenna and her English friend Mark. The walk by the Thames cleared the previous nights cobwebs away and after a coffee in a very busy Starbucks we headed to Covent Garden station to meet the other two. Jenna came running out and greeted us all with warm hugs and we headed into Covent Garden for a stroll and chat. We browsed a few shops including Games Workshop and there was a good acoustic style band playing in one of the sunken sections of the market. Stomachs rumbling we weaved through some streets and ended up at a very old style pub called The Round Table where Jenna treated us all to some food, though three platters of mixed nibbles were barely enough to feed us all but would at least keep us going for a while. Part of our 'loose' plan was head over to the Limehouse area of east London to a pub called The Grapes which legendary actor Ian McKellen and Gandalf from the Lord of the Rings himself was part owner in (more here). We decided to head over there after the food and at this point James went into hyper mode conversation wise and wouldn't cease. Suddenly he was an authority in everything and even when the conversation briefly became contentious (it was about royalty) he wouldn't do the diplomatic thing and shut up. My thought being these were new people we were meeting and obviously had different views so I didn't really want to upset anyone or sabre rattle this early on. Eventually he stopped talking and we consulted tube maps for the journey eastwards. Some of the journey was on the DLR (Docklands Light Rail) and after a crowded tube journey in which Jenna saved me from hurtling down the train into other people by holding my hand tightly. It was a touching and thoughtful gesture as not being the tallest of people tube travel can be daunting when crowded.

At Limehouse Alan got a street map up on his phone and we soon found The Grapes down by the Thames. Walking towards it Jenna's friend Mark said he didn't know what to make of the area. He pointed out London is a collection of small towns joined together which ironically I'm sure my friend Pat also from London once said. Mark added that this area didn't seem to have an identity though some of this might be attributed to the gloomy weather. Personally it struck me as being a very affluent area with gated residential apartments, some with reception areas, that said I'm no expert on other areas of London that much really so I'm sure Mark has a relevant point. The whole area was quite nice and had canals and locks and a quite suburban feel. Characterless? well maybe a little but quite nice also.

The Grapes was a lovely little pub. A narrow dimly lit wooden affair with friendly bar staff but sadly no wizards in the form of Ian McKellen but then I knew the chances of seeing him were slim anyway. We settled in, drinks flowed nicely, James's capacity for talking hadn't ceased but we inter weaved with each other conversation wise as a group. A few hours dropped off the clock and it was a lovely place to pass the waning hours of an afternoon in getting to know new people. Jenna and Mark were lovely genuine people and I'm really pleased I met them, putting names to faces is always good. As afternoon slipped into evening we headed back into the Embankment area of London and after some indecision of what to do pub wise we ended up in a pub called The Sherlock Holmes which proved to be a good choice as it was fairly reasonably priced and the food was very good. The evening soon passed away, James continued to talk a lot but was slowing down a little and we said our goodbyes at the Embankment tube station after what was (ear bending aside) was a really good day.

On getting back to Southwark we had a final drink in The Ring pub near the hotel, said our goodbyes as we were heading back early the next day and then it was off to bed, I was tired after such an active day.

So Sunday came, up early and in no time back at Kings Cross and homeward bound. Alas the train broke down at Finsbury Park just outside of London and limped back to Kings Cross. James wasn't best pleased and berated public transport but I knew our tickets would be valid on another train back so didn't worry at all. They couldn't repair the train so after 30 minutes or so we were directed onto another. James stomped off and that was the last I saw of him. The platform was crowded and I had no idea which carriage he'd boarded, though I boarded pretty much the same one as indicated on my ticket. Soon London was behind me and I was disembarking back home walking up the quiet leafy road towards home.

All in all it was a welcome break that passed far too quickly, Jenna, Alan and Mark where lovely people and I'm really glad I met them. Next year perhaps? I'll even bring a ball gag for James!

2012

So that was 2012, personally an unremarkable year but not a totally wasted one either. When I reflect back over 2012 its been a year of highs and lows but neither at any great height or depth.

The low stuff? Well ongoing health issues, employment and love. Midway through the year I also hit a low patch, I wouldn't exactly call it depression and took no medication but there was a time when I struggled to be motivated and felt gloomy for a good duration. I think I only ever told a couple of people and I went around wearing a painted smile. It's hard to put into words how I felt but eventually I shook it off, I bounced back and now its behind me.

The highs? Becoming an unlikely male model photographed by a famous artist in London. Malta in spring. My Humanist blog, having the eye tattooed again and friends that made life ever enjoyable. There have been other good moments but the above are the ones that spring immediately to mind.

I think on the whole 2012 made me a better person inside. I certainly became stronger, absorbed more, became something of a rebel with causes yet remained balanced and able to realise when I was wrong and needed to re-align matters. Less beer has been consumed and more books have been read. Even when I momentarily glanced into the past I felt no emotion, a sure sign I'd moved on.

So what do I want for 2013, well apart from the usual health and happiness I want many things. I want to carry on building great friendships, I want to travel more and get my car back on the road. In these uncertain times I want stability (who doesn't!?) but I'm still going to speak out against issues many would rather avoid. Honestly speaking I don't have a concrete plan for 2013 but I've always liked to be flexible, I suspect the car being road worthy again and becoming fitter are immediate priorities though, then I'll take it from there.

So bring on 2013. I'm ready!

Of Facebook, Friends and Passions Bold

'Monsieur l'abbé, I detest what you write, but I would give my life to make it possible for you to continue to write.' 

Was written by Voltaire in a letter to M. le Riche, February 6, 1770. It's often misquoted nowadays along the lines of 'I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it'. With that sentence said, and hopefully digested by anyone reading I want to write frankly about feelings, passions and that modern conundrum of social networking - Facebook.

I have to be honest and say I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. Like most human beings I'm inquisitive, so checking into Facebook regularly satisfies my thirst for knowledge and curiosity. Overall I think I like it mainly because it keeps all friends and associates alike in one place. I suspect some just have a large friends list to stroke their own ego though!

That said I don't always like what I see on there. I'll be candid for a moment and say I don't like a constant stream of updates by the same person. Then there's the things I have no interest in, babies, dogs, repeated posting of regurgitated imaged jokes that are still doing the rounds from Myspace and constant posting of music videos. 

BUT....

That said I have nothing personally against the person posting, because to be honest, if I had kids I'd be passionate about them, I'd be proud and want the world to know about them. If I had a dog, the same would apply, as would a favourite musical band, and on it goes. So even though I grind my teeth about some things I'd always defend peoples right to post whatever they want. What do I like to see? Well I enjoy witty comments, jokes, holiday photos as I love travel and links to interesting articles. So I guess the likes offset the dislikes and you have to take into account we're all different, we can't all like the same thing - fact.

The reality is on platforms such as Facebook is that people don't do criticism well, who does really? Criticism and things like ridicule come in different forms of course and can be constructive as well as negative but when we do either - we reason. I recently told a female friend I thought she posted too many status updates and many seemed mundane or irrelevant. This of course didn't go down well and I woke the next day to find myself deleted as a friend. Oh well, my timing wasn't perfect but my criticism was that if I was finding minutiae and tedium in her status's then others may do but of course I realise she has every right to post status's as much as she likes. I don't mind being deleted and obviously my comments hit a nerve but in all honesty her constant stream of comments pointed towards insecurity and a desire to be popular when really she was likeable enough in the first place. Sometimes people need telling and in some circumstances its for the right reasons or we care.

This is where Facebook is used as a weapon though, an emotional base tool akin to infantile playground psychology 'I've suddenly decided I don't like you and I'm not your friend anymore'. We may all remove people from time to time on Facebook for varying valid reasons. I've done it myself but the usual reason for me is I don't really know the person, or they are the type to add you then never speak when they see you in the street. Would I delete someone for disagreeing or criticism of me? Highly unlikely.

I often clash with people on Facebook because some of my views are controversial, I seemingly have a faculty to disenchant people with my opinions and critical thinking. I'm pretty sure some of this is because people don't want think critically, they are comfortable in their bubble and stepping out of it can be unnerving. They may also disagree with me because they have genuine logical and legitimate reasons to do so, after all people do think differently, which is why I like debate so I can see different angles on things. Though I may have strong thoughts and passionate opinions I am not afraid to be outwitted or proved wrong.

Take for instance a recent status of mine in which I openly voiced opinion against the Pope and Queen. People didn't like it, knee jerk reactions occurred and strong counter opinions were voiced, some however were in total concurrence. The person that didn't like my comments is an ex military sort, excellent morals and not a bad bloke at all, the queen and country noble sort you might say and we seem to share a passion for dark humour. The irony was though whilst he was happy to defend religion he has been open about his feelings on Muslims etc in the past, some of which I share, especially on immigration. So the obvious counter argument would be you can defend one faith yet not another? Christianity can be a comfort to millions yet Islam cannot? I don't like any organised faith, though more of that shortly. He actually backed a comment once that I did on immigration but probably believes Britain is still great. I'd say we are both patriots in a different way.

Personally speaking, I don't like the Monarchy, I feel we are descending into neo-feudalism where the cultural and rich/poor divide is getting bigger. So inevitably what we may be come is something like a quasi medieval society and the historically minded will all know how grim those times were. Just look at Henry VIII, he used religion to his advantage, used ordinary men in wars to acquire territory and wealth and gorged on lavish banquets when many had nothing. I'm not saying the current monarchy is the same of course but they have many, many faults and we shouldn't blindly put so much emphasis on them as we do in my opinion, the days of the empire are long gone, we need to modernise and not keep giving rich people even more money.

Moving to religion, well that would take an age to explain my complete and utter revulsion of it. The pope preaches love and peace in his Christmas message yet openly takes a swipe at gay people, a contradiction in terms. The papacy is an organisation that is seeing thousands die in Africa by telling them using condoms is against gods will. How in rationalities name is this good??

My views on organised religion are so strong that I have been writing a Humanist blog since March of this year. I am wholehearted and passionately opposed to it for countless reasons.

So going full circle. Passion for things is what drives us, you are passionate, I am passionate, you have interests, I have interests, you have causes, I have causes and we all have different humour. The stigma attached to shorter people like me voicing opinions is that we have 'little man syndrome'. Any person under 5'5" kicking off is seemingly labelled with it. No such condition exists of course but its often used to denigrate the more vertically challenged of us should we get uppity and dare to have an opinion. I understand the term of course, and in some ways I agree it can be applicable, but only in the sense of a short person with real anger issues actively seeking physical confrontation to prove something, that is just folly. Maybe in my late teens and early twenties I may have been more like that, trying to stand shoulder to shoulder in the big wide world but you soon find out big people hurt when they hit (physics!) but that's not to say little people can't hurt back, Mike Tyson was never the tallest of boxers I believe. Fighting in any form, though necessary on occasion, should be avoided, I'd go for debate and dialogue every time. I realise I am diminutive in physical stature, I'm happy with that especially in my more mature years, wit and words have to be my weapons because brawn cannot be, I just wouldn't want to be the big sort who clobbered someone because they disagreed and could do so through sheer physical force. I guess I'm the Tyrion Lannister sort, for anyone that watches the Game of Thrones series or reads the books.

My passions, my angers, my beliefs are done via the medium of blogging and Facebook, with words and reasoning, done with honesty and done so all can see. Anyone who really knows me, knows the real me as a person despite my rants, opinions and dark satire. On many occasions I cross swords on Facebook with another friend but we always chat about views when we meet and we appreciate each others brevity on certain things.

I'm fortunate to live in a democracy and have free speech. On some occasions though I've been wrong, certain criticisms of the Fox & Crown come to mind but these were things I felt passionate about at the time but reacted to in haste and by listening to people whom perhaps I shouldn't but I'm human and I make mistakes. I deleted my blog on the pub and spoke to the people concerned, admittedly I should have perhaps done that in the first place. I know all don't agree with me, I don't expect them to but I hope the bonds of friendship transcends differences in opinions and they are mutually respected. I just want to end with the fact if you don't feel happy about something then don't be ever be afraid to say!

As Mark Twain once said; 'Our opinions do not really blossom into fruition until we have expressed them to someone else.'

I may not like everyone's views or opinions but like Voltaire I would defend their right to have them. Social Networking and blogging may not be everyone's proverbial cup of tea but it gives millions a voice - 'Vive la social revolution!'

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Review

So there I sat, a happy little hobbit waiting for a film I'd always wanted to see, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey though the reality is this isn't an unexpected review!

*Warning the following review has minor rants and contains spoilers*

The film starts well with Ian Holm reprising his role as the original Bilbo Baggins alongside Elijah Wood playing Frodo in what is a nice little prologue piece linking the movie to the past Lord of the Rings trilogy via Bilbo's memoirs.

Then more back story follows regarding the Dwarven kingdoms of Erebor before Gandalf presents himself at Bag End and invites the new Bilbo (Martin Freeman) 'On an adventure'. So far, so good and it gets better when the dwarves 'come-a-knockin' at the shy hobbit's round door. The atmosphere is infectious, the dwarves are brimming with character and a couple of songs add to the proceedings and light heartedness. Peter Jackson's script writers have also injected some humour in there which works well and has the audience laughing along.

Bone of contention #1

I'm surprised that despite his eye for detail Jackson fails to explain how Gandalf and Thorin have actually met, to omit something like that didn't sit well with me. They both actually meet at the Prancing Pony in Bree before the main story begins and travel together to the Shire, both discovering mutual goals. It would have been so easy for Jackson to have inserted a brief scene of them meeting in Bree to explain things but no, you're left to work that one out for yourself.

Proceedings move swiftly on to the dwarven mission and off we trot seemingly with little deliberation for Bilbo except for a few moments of silence when he gazes around his empty hobbit hole but this is only a small gripe on my part.

Bilbo soon sets off and we are out of the Shire, which leaves me wondering why Jackson rebuilt the entire Hobbiton village again, because we see little of it, if at all, unless we see more in a future film.

So, onto the road we go, some more back story on Thorin from the excellent Ken Stott who plays the aged dwarven veteran 'Balin'. We were promised more of Middle Earth and I felt Jackson could have done a CGI Bree in the distance for a fleeting scene before the party enter the Lonelands. Suddenly its into the Trollshaws and the Trolls. 

Bone of contention #2

Balin mentions more of the back story of Thorin and the battle of Azanulbizar in which Thorin was wounded after fighting Azog (allegedly) but gains his name from using an oak branch as a shield. The film distorts this beyond belief. Page 1410, Appendix A, states that Thorin was wounded in the battle along with Thrain and there's a footnote to Thorin getting his name from the oaken branch but that's as far as it goes for Thorin in the battle, he's only a young dwarf then after all. Azog the orc is actually slain in this battle by a young Dain Ironfoot after Azog slays Nain his father. Dain despite his young years slays Azog and beheads him, he's shaken by it all but goes onto greater things, but the battle is won even though the dwarven loses are grievous (Return of the King, page 1411 appendix A). Despite all this in the movie Azog is alive and well and hungry for more despite having had his head hewn off and thrust on a stake in the book. So the stage is now set in the movie for Azog to be Thorins nemesis and for a purist like me its unforgivable. It will be interesting to see how they portray Billy Connelly who plays Dain in a later film but any credit of him killing Azog has been stolen from him by the meddling Jackson.

Moving on, we meet the wizard Radagast the Brown who is played very adeptly by Sylvester McCoy and isn't as irritating as earlier reports suggested, however...

Bone of contention #3

How does Radagast move so quickly from Rhosgobel in Mirkwood over the Misty Mountains and bump into the company? Its a good old trek and bumping into the company by chance? I think not, there's fate and good luck but come on! I'm not against Radagast's appearance in the film but in the books he barely gets a line or two and the movie embellishes his role above and beyond its need.

So the trolls dealt with we have Azog in hot pursuit and suddenly the terrain changes from woodland to barren hills in the blink of an eye, the company descend into the safety of Rivendell and we get more story distortions on the council of the wise meeting etc, though it seems to work ok.

Thorin isn't a happy dwarf and heads off as he's working against the clock mission wise. So off the party head again and set about traversing the Misty Mountains. Not a wise move but the interlude where the giants enter is vastly over emphasised and adds nothing to the movie, its not a bone of contention I just didn't see the point in mountains moving and theatrics. The party take shelter, Bilbo isn't happy and then the goblins capture all but Bilbo.

Andy Serkis returns as Gollum, steals the show again and the riddle scene is faithfully recreated. The we get Gandalf returning to rescue the dwarves and like the mountain scene an overstated scene of escape in which rickety wooden platforms and rope bridges look more like a Keystone cops caper than able dwarves escaping, it doesn't feel right at all, though Barry Humpries works well as the Goblin king and there's some chuckles in there.

Bilbo having unwittingly discovered the one ring realises that it makes him invisible and makes his escape from the now maniacal Gollum and rejoins the dwarves. Though...

Bone of contention #4

Bilbo having gave Gollum the slip actually escapes from goblins and rejoins the dwarves, The Hobbit, Riddles in the Dark pages 85-86 but this is a minor moan really.

So on escaping Azog once again gives pursuit to our unlucky band having had a seemingly easier journey thus far. The dwarves get trapped up trees just like in the book but...

Bone of contention #5

Azog and Thorin bump heads and get it on and Bilbo joins in the battle with the rest of the dwarves before they are all rescued by the eagles. They do get rescued by the eagles in the book but the skirmish never actually occurs and of course Azog shouldn't even be there!

So, that really concludes the film and I guess if you're reading this that I didn't really enjoy it. On the contrary I did but I can't abide Jacksons meddling when it isn't necessary at all, the book provides plenty of material and so do later appendices and references. On a more positive note, when the closing credits came down my friend Dominic turned to me and said 'It feels like we've never been away'. He was right, it didn't, the one good thing despite new technological innovations is Middle Earth still feels familiar and that's a boon for the viewer and casual Tolkien fan. New Zealand does capture the feel of Middle Earth well but I can't help musing what if some bits had actually been filmed here in England, it would have been nice. 

Despite the bending of the original story the film works well enough, the actors hold the film up well, Ian McKellen being especially excellent as a returning Gandalf. Freeman is a revelation as Bilbo and fits the role fantastically and the actors playing the dwarves are all very commendable too, though some get more lines than others, of course this may change. I really liked Ken Stott playing the elder Dwarf Balin. The film is a little protracted but I never really felt bored as the pace moves along fairly well with the odd pause, Rivendell being the main one.

In all honesty it felt good to be back in Middle Earth, I suspect greater things will come (well I hope so) in later films and the characters will grow even more. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey isn't an epic but its not shabby either, Peter Jackson has taken many liberties with it and some of it works and for purists like me some is just downright wrong. I can't judge a whole trilogy on one film but it isn't a bad start all said and done but its nothing earth shattering either.

I can't help wondering what another director would do with it all but I guess that will never happen in my time. If I had to rate it out of 10, then I'd give it a solid 7 but I can't help feeling a little disenchanted by Jacksons meddling. I'll go see it again in 48 frames per second I suspect. The soundtrack is also noteworthy and like the LoTR's trilogy compliments things well.

So, to end with, not a bad movie experience by any means, I'd recommend it and I'd see it again but I think it'll be better to judge it as a trilogy than a one off film at the end of the day.

The Final Countdown

The tickets are purchased and now the waiting and anticipation begins, I'm talking about The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. Soon the magical story from my childhood will grace the big screen and the characters from the book will spring to life as imagined by director Peter Jackson and Co. Whilst I am excited, I am also feeling tentative because being something of a Tolkien purist I want it to look and feel right whilst keeping to the original story. 

The reviews and feedback so far vary widely. Much is being debated from technical merits to the length of the film and opinion does seem divided though it does lean towards favourable. I always expected it to get some flak, after all Peter Jackson isn't everyone's cup of tea. Of course I'll have to wait until I see it for myself, and indeed I did have issues with the Lord of the Rings trilogy which I felt had genuine moments of cinematic greatness to dull and protracted interludes that added nothing to the story. The bottom line with books that become films is that they are adapted to suit the masses.

I'm looking forward to this movie, it feels very much like the movie(s) that I've always wanted and waited and now its all reality. Bilbo Baggins maybe an unlikely hero but he's always been my hero and now he's leaping from the pages of the book onto the screen. 

As I've mentioned before in past blogs, I read The Hobbit and then read the Lord of the Rings whilst on holiday in Yorkshire aged around 14. I remember being sat outside the farmhouse we stayed in steadily reading through the book, gazing at the maps and daydreaming about Middle Earth. There were always parts I never really understood and re-read but as I absorbed the pages I was flanked by the shimmering sea to my left and rolling wooded hills to my right. I would often stop reading and imagine characters from the books walking through the beautiful countryside around me. So whatever happens with the upcoming movies I will still have the books and the memories regardless.

So the countdown until Thursday and the movie begins. I expect my excitement will steadily mount and hopefully I will be able to do some kind of review come the end of this week.

Martin Freeman is Bilbo Baggins and he's going on an adventure!

......

Midnight

The Lords of Midnight was a game that had me hooked as a youngster. So much so that in my final year of school in 1984 I'd stay up till almost the next day playing it on my Sinclair ZX Spectrum. It was an amazing strategy role playing game that will always stay with me as one of the most influential games I've ever played. Today a friend emailed me to say the creator of that game series had died, his name was Mike Singleton. This report in the Guardian describes the game better than I ever could. I do feel a tinge of sadness at his passing, of course I never knew him or anything about him personally but it was his game that had me hooked on a game genre that I cannot give up to this day, on reflection it really was a ground breaking game.

I fondly remember nights sat peering into a colour portable tv having loaded the game in via a clunky cassette recorder. I'd immerse myself in the game, plan strategies, make notes and replace the game cassette with something like Duran Duran. I still recall listening to The Chauffeur by them whilst playing the game, oddly it seemed to fit the pace and mystery of the game. Happy nostalgic memories, and to Mike Singleton, a true visionary - thank you for those memories and rest in peace.