Big Brother - on it's arse

I’ve watched Big Brother with morbid fascination, shaking my head at how dire it suddenly seems. This years house mates are dull, I mean really dull, only Pete seems to have any semblance of a personality. With two housemates gone in the first week and the press critics beginning to stick the knife in Endemol and Channel 4 have a problem on their hands. Personally I don’t think they vet the housemates enough, why don’t they have several mock up houses, put a load of people in each one for a week or so and then take the best ones for the real house, at least that way they’d worm out the dullards from the potentials – or even better just put average joe public in there instead of wannabe’s with no real personality.

I will say this already, tourette sufferer Pete will win. My blogging friend Minxtress tipped him from the off, I’ve a feeling she will be proved right. Already on a Big Brother forum someone posted and quite funnily quoted ‘R2-D2 to win’ – and he will. He is the only refreshing character in there, a gentle guy with bags of personality and a disability, and why not have people with disabilities? I’ll tell you why because we are all prudes and judgemental and would just laugh but wouldn’t it be refreshing to see someone in a wheelchair, a blind person or a dwarf – I’m talking life’s achievers and battlers, people that can overcome and be inspirations to others, the unsung heroes of today’s society.

This years big brother made me cringe, especially the whole ‘Shabaz’ saga, here is a person who seems to be lacking in social skills, and not surprising seeing as this able bodied person has been unemployed for 17 years. He didn’t really gel with the housemates because of his social skills and over tactile approach. He swiftly became annoying but how did the rest of the group react to this? – childish bullying, Instead of dealing with it in an adult manner they resorted to immature tactics making the whole thing very cringe-worthy telly. It wasn’t a shock when he left, more of a relief and I’m sure the guy will be receiving psychiatric help.

Then we have Bonnie or ‘Bonnaayyy’ as she calls herself. Touted as a real wild child on the opening night it couldn’t have been further from the truth. She bleated when the others got her name wrong as she said ‘I’m Bonnaayy’ yet amazingly she could pronounce it properly on the second attempt. She should be called Bonnet de douche – yep that means shower cap in French, and let’s face it, she has all the personality of one, my bet is she goes first.

Glyn the Welsh lifeguard – I’ve seen 7 year olds on my road with more character.

Dawn at least got one over on big brother, by using code, jokingly called the ‘Dawn Vinci code’ by the press. She had the sense to tell her relatives to exploit the big bro rules and tell them a family member was sick if she was receiving bad press on the outside. Big brother are obliged to inform housemates if a family member is ill, and of course they did, hence the prompt for cunning Dawn demand to leave.

The rest are pretty much posing characterless preening prima donna’s who constantly stroke their own and each others egos – enough said.

So, Channel 4 needs to do something drastic to change things, everyone I know is saying how bad it is this year and I’m sure it’s the same around the country. Can Channel 4 and Endemol reverse things?

Lets wait and see but I remain cynical.

First Love

We all leave the past behind to some degree, forget about the events and more often than not the people that shaped it. Today I came bumped into a person from my past, someone who had an effect on me back then, it was my first love – I guess we never forget them.

Heading into town today I got soaked but I had to venture out to pay bills, get items and generally do things that people do. On completing all my tasks I sauntered towards the bus station via the shopping centre to avoid the shitty weather, suddenly looking up I saw her, my first girlfriend and what I saw hurt me to the core.

Before I continue, and in fact use a different name for her I need to take you back, back to the early eighties when I was around fourteen or maybe fifteen.

Back then I’d discovered girls one day, yep it just seems to happen, you pass from a boy into a teenager suddenly, leave the boyish things behind and a transition takes place, its hard to describe – it just happens. I’d like to think back then I was a trend setter, I had an unusual black rucksack that everyone wanted, a push bike my dad had custom built for me, winkle picker shoes and those fluffy white towel type socks everyone used to wear. I was lucky, my mum worked in a knitwear factory that made them, I got them cheap and sold them on, so it made me popular.

One day, Mark a roguish friend of mine confessed he has a crush on a girl called Kerry in the year below us, he asked my opinion of her and if I’d approach her and ask her out for him? That day I did, I caught her on the path between our two school buildings with her friend Pippa. I must have been eloquent that day because Kerry wasn’t sure about Mark at first but I managed to persuade her on a date with him. Pippa looked on and remained silently smiling, she was tall, had long wavy tresses of red hair, her smile was wide and she had lovely eyes. Remembering back she was very curvy for her age and walked gracefully, sure I fancied her but then again I my hormones were raging teen ones and I fancied different girls on a daily basis. Anyway, having done my duty for a mate I headed back to report my success and all was well. Pippa was on my mind but I reassured myself not to make any advance on her as she was way out of my league, getting rebuffed at school was embarrassing and news always spread rapidly!

When the afternoon break came I was walking jauntily along when Kerry and Pippa appeared in front of me. Kerry swept back her human league-esque fringe and said ‘Jay how would you like to take Pippa out?’ as Pippa remained silent and looked at me expectantly I managed to blurt out a shocked ‘Yes’ as my heart did somersaults.

The date went great and the next few weeks seemed a romantic blur, of course back then I had very little conception of what romance really is but I’m sure you get my drift – it was young love, a voyage of discovery. We’d spend nights on the park between where we lived, she lived in a posh part of town and I lived in a very much working class area. Evenings on the park would just consist of cuddles, chatter and clumsy petting attempts but nothing more, there was a lovely innocence to it all really. Often I’d just sit gazing into her lovely big eyes as her hair rustled in the breeze and not really believing my luck. At school we held hands a lot, despite the fact she towered over me, my credibility with the cooler boys went sky high and at lunch times we’d find a sunny spot on the grass and kiss gently.

But as you know, all things come to an end, at that age we are all fickle and rapidly changing creatures. The end came for us at the local leisure centre roller disco. I couldn’t skate for the life of me and probably looked very embarrassing to be with, so when Pippa tumbled over it wasn’t me who came to her aid but someone else, a blonde haired blue eyed boy charmer from my year at school.

Come the end of the roller disco I was history, unceremoniously dumped in favour of Mr Posh Blonde whose skating was as smooth as his patter. Dejectedly I walked home in tears; it was my first dose of emotional pain, being something of a new experience it hurt all the more (and it hurts just as much in later years too!). As the next few weeks passed I wasn’t really nice to Pippa, but then at that age we don’t handle things at an adult level do we? Time passed, Mr Blonde super skater got the flick (much to my evil amusement) and within no time I’d left school and was in the big wide world.

I saw Pippa odd times after that, I would often whiz past her parent’s house on my moped, probably trying to look cool but in reflection and deep down I missed Pippa. Adulthood comes along and then memories become lost in the annals of time, hedonistic late teen years and early twenties arrive and girls come and go – life goes on. The next time I saw Pippa was in the local rag about a year or so ago, she was in the ‘Just Married’ section stood beside some rugby player type who seemed much older than her but I remember thinking to myself how good she still looked, I smiled and inside I was happy for her, happy she was doing ok, even as the odd ancient memory filtered back from those vague days.

Today when I saw Pippa I wanted to cry. There she sat in one of those motorised chair things that you often see old folk so arrogantly driving around. Our eyes met and Pippa looked down, avoiding my gaze – it was as though she seemed ashamed or embarrassed. I felt stunned and wanted to smile and say hello but then I had this awful feeling that my smile would be misconstrued as a sneer. Within a second she’d passed me, deliberately avoiding making eye contact. I passed through the shopping centre automatic doors and felt pretty bad as breathed in the damp air, its not like I still had feelings for her but was just shocked to see her like that, looking so fawn-like and weak. I dunno what to say now really.

Metro

Does anyone out there think the ‘Metro’ Newspaper found on buses and trains is a good read?

As soon as I board any public transport I immediately look for Metro, because in all honesty I think it’s a really good read. Metro is informative, politically impartial, light-hearted and easy to read. It has a wide cross section of news stories, that contain, national, international and local news. My favourite bit has to be the music reviews and local band news. If Metro wasn’t free I’d probably buy it!

http://www.metro.co.uk/

Idea becomes Institution

I usually blog about Channel 4’s reality tv programme ‘Big Brother’ every year but this year I’m not going to give it so much attention.

Several reasons really, basically it’s been over hyped by the tabloid press, in a self confessional the tabloids and glossy mags admit Big Brother is good for sales. Next is the every increasingly bizarre contestant’s in order to gain a captive audience – what has happened to the show that seemingly started off with ‘normalish’ house mates in a psychological experiment?

The thing is, the initial idea has now become an institution, the media happy to help, oblige and in turn crucify the hapless wannabe’s (though the wannabe's don't do themselves any favours!). I’m pretty sure they’d have good television by putting normal characters in there and see how they cope and overcome various hardships and challenges, alas no, we have a circus instead, people that don’t really represent a cross section of ‘real’ society.

I’m not saying I’m not going to watch Big Brother because I will but I’m not the fan I once was of the show.

Gone but not forgotten

Sony have announced that they have ceased production of the Playstation/PsOne. On reading the report in my monthly games magazine I felt a sense of sadness and a glow of nostalgia. In my collection of 20 odd games consoles the PsOne really is the hero of them all, mainly because it was a console that revolutionised things and made video gaming mainstream.

The Playstation One began its life back in December 1994 in Japan and came to Europe the following year, since then it has gone on to sell massive 103 million units globally (the Atari Vcs sold around 25 million units back in the 80’s). Research showed that one in three households in the United States owned a Playstation 1. The playstation 1 can boast almost 7,750 titles, more than any other console.

But, some things never die, Sony has said its new console the PS3 will still be fully backwards compatible with all previous games and they are also releasing an official emulator for the playstation portable so we can play all those old favourites on the move!

Babe of the Week No.2

Well my 2nd 'Babe of the week' is Juliette Lewis (hubba hubba). I'd forgot how foxy she really was until she popped up on 'My name is Earl' last Friday. Then I thought hhhmmm, here's number 2 for the blog, plus I like the films she has been in such as Strange Days, Natural Born Killers, Cape Fear and Dusk Till Dawn to name but a few.

Thanks

So, London didn’t happen, I guess at such short notice I was up against it. I’m philosophical about it all now I guess though my head was down for a couple of days about it though. I have to draw positives from it, at least I got offered the job and it was the first big interview in a while.

Thanks to all of you out there who offered help, advice and support – you know who you all are.

One text from a female friend made me smile, it said ‘I’m not losing you to the southern jessies am I?’

Well, not now but I’m sure those southerners could have done with my stoic wisdom and good old fashioned northern directness!

Slipping away...

I’ve have been offered the job in London, came as a bit of a shock but now I’m up against logistics, extortionate train fares and high rents. I’m really happy about being offered the job, working in London has always been a dream of mine, and I’d love to be able to say that I had the experience of working in London for a while at the very least. So, here I have the chance of working in the busy and exciting capital, ok the money isn’t amazing (19K) but we all have to start somewhere don’t we? Added to that, it’s an opportunity for other things, a way out of my dull as dishwater town.

Having been offered the job Thursday I decided the best immediate plan would be to travel into London direct from Newark, become a commuter, the journey is about 1 and 20 minutes, not bad when you consider it can take 45-50 mins to get back from Nottingham by car in the rush hour and that’s only 18 miles away.

So Friday became a fact finding mission, looking at private properties to rent and finding some decent small flats for £300-330 per month. The shock came on visiting the train station to check out monthly travel tickets – a whopping £632 per month. I asked the man behind the screen again in disbelief and he showed me the screen to confirm it, even then I went back a second time to re-affirm it after standing outside the entrance shaking my head. I felt angry, especially as earlier in the week I’d paid £45 for a late return ticket for the interview only to find the train half empty, yet they make it sound as if they are squeezing you on last minute. Before that when I tried to sort one to attend an earlier interview they wanted £129 for a first class one way ticket – to which I said ‘No way’. What are the train people pissing about at? They don’t encourage you to get on trains!

Suddenly the job was starting to slip away, travel, rent, bills etc making it all seem pointless, I’d hardly have any money left. Dejected I headed back into Newark and sat by the river with a pint to gather my thoughts on which was essentially a lovely day weather wise, only there was a thunderstorm going on in my head.

Later, looking on the net a properties in places such as Camden and Hertfordshire just outside of London the rent prices were high (as expected really) and the transport into London a lot cheaper, about £140 per month from Herts. There definitely a pendulum effect, cheaper rent – high travel cost or fairly high rent – cheaper travel.

So my dilemma goes on, I feel low, really pissed off and angry at how much things now cost – Blair you have a lot to answer for!

The sands of time are ticking, I did speak to an ex in Hertfordshire who says I could kip on her sofa until I was sorted but if things didn’t work out with her mate-wise or I didn’t like the job then I’m a long way from home.

At this point I just feel like its all slipping away, a great chance being screwed up to circumstances out of my control, or if I’m being honest - realistically out of my reach.

Hobbit and the City

Yesterday I had an interview down in London, I was looking forward to the day out if nothing else as I'd not been to London in over a year and I have to confess I do like it (There you go Pat, an admission). Anyway after the interview was done and dusted I had some time to kill, I was supposed to meet a friend but she let me down (you know who you are *giggle*) so I decided to have a wander. As the interview was on Oxford Street I wandered into Soho and onto Wardour Street and explored some of the small alleyways and streets off of there. A fair way down Wardour St on the corner of Meard Street I noticed a shop called 'The Hobbit' which made me smile and of course, I had to take a photo!

Then I slowly headed back to the Oxford circus tube station I passed the Paladium and had to laugh at the sign above the door 'Ol Blue Eyes is Back!', since having my eye operation alot of people have been calling me blue eyes.


I then headed up to the place I love in London the most - Camden. It was a lovely day, the sun was shining and I lounged by the canal after doing some shopping (new pair of shoes!). There's such an atmosphere and vibe about Camden, I don't know it all that well really but I'd love to explore it more, the shopping is amazing. The pictures below show Camden market and canal.