Comedy - you must be joking

Craig Cash and Phil Mealey of Early Doors, northern comedy and no southern lager tops

Was it me or were the comedy awards without comedy content, apart from Johnny Vegas?

Looking at the winners list I was shaking my head in disbelief, surely this wasn’t the best British comedy has to offer? Ricky Gervais to me is very over rated and not really a veteran of the comedy scene like people think he is, I mean he hasn’t really done a lot has he?
Little Britain scooped a few awards, I do like Matt Lucas but I’m not a fan of Little Britain, Lucas is versatile and funny but I think he still has time to grow and nurture his comic talent. Other winners included Caroline Quentin and Martin Clune - who decides these awards, come on guys wake up and smell the coffee!

Ant and Dec comedians? Kiss my furry hobbit arse! I like the two Geordie gas bags but comics they certainly are not. Then there was the kiss arse tribute to The Simpson, sure I like the show but it’s becoming a bit old hat now.

School of Rock won the best comedy film, total pants. What about Shaun of the dead?

Negatives aside I did enjoy the show, Jonathon Ross sharp as ever was dressed as a paragon of effect dandyism and Johnny Vegas’s seemingly drunken rant broke the boredom and mutual backslapping. Incidentally I met Jonathon Ross in London once with my friend Pat before we went into a comic shop, he ended up buying some of my jokes (well some of that sentence is true). Another plus was that Sharon and Kelly Osbourne were there, any chance of a mother and daughter threesome ladies? Then there was Mrs Ross, the lovely and very ample Jane Goldman (drools).

But where was the real British comedy? Where was Craig Cash and Phil Mealey the writers of the excellent ‘Early Doors’? Where was Phoenix Nights? Simon Pegg and Spaced?

I guess they weren’t present because they are not over hyped or considered en vogue with the British comedy scene. And where the F**k was Ken Dodd ?!!?

Every one knows the home of British comedy is in the north, all except Billy Connelly that is.